Monday, March 29, 2010


In seven days: Muse
In seventeen days: road trip to Coachella
In thirty-two days: graduation

And later this summer:
(with some luck and love) Sting and the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra
James Taylor and Carole King
home to California for the Heywood family reunion
...and anything else that presents itself (like hopefully a new job and new living arrangements)

Sunday, March 14, 2010

For some reason, I absolutely love this photo. It has something to do with the cuteness of Jana's little smile and the dress she's wearing, Marie rubbing her eye and holding that little flute, and my hair with the funky crimp in it, probably from having it up and then taking it down. And the purple pants. Also the tree. I have such fond memories of that tree. It was the landmark that told people which house was ours. "The one with the big Chinese elm in the middle of the yard." And the wall behind us, aka "the balance beam." Oh, the hours spent doing "gymnastics" on our "balance beam." It also has something to do with the image itself. The sharp contrast between the focus on us three girls, and the fuzzy plants and wall behind us. I wish I knew what year this was taken. I think it had to have been just before I started kindergarten, which was the same year we moved into the house, and the year David was born.

I read a post on Facebook the other day by a friend who wished for the days of her childhood, to go back to when her biggest stress was when she couldn't find her Barbie doll. I sometimes think back to my days as a kid, spending all summer outside and shoeless, riding bikes around town with my friends, putting on plays and making up dances with the neighbors, when my biggest stress was not being able to get my little brothers and sisters to do what I told them to do. Those were great days. They were fun. But as great and fun as they were, I don't want to go back. There are so many great and fun things to look forward to that I don't want to spend time living in the past. I look forward to my future. I just hope I can make it a good one.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Nickelback or...?

Jana and I played a game today.

"If you had to listen to only Nickelback or Britney Spears the rest of your life, which would you choose?" Britney, hands down.

Nickelback or Christina Aguilera? Christina.

Nickelback or 98 Degrees? 98 Degrees.

Nickelback or Evanescence? Eww... I can't... Uh... Evanescence, I guess.

Nickelback or Linkin Park? Agh. Gross. Well, if I have to choose... Linkin Park.

Nickelback or Fergie? Just Fergie--no Black-Eyed Peas? Um... neither.

Question: who would you rather listen to over Nickelback? I guess, for me, it's pretty much anyone. Except Fergie.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

I've been thinking...

Miracles happen.

Thinking about things you're looking forward to helps to lift your mood.

Prayer is can be a real communication with God.

Laughter releases endorphins.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010


I'm gonna be 30 soon.

Well, OK. I'm gonna be 30 in two and a half years. But that's soon.

While getting ready for church on Sunday morning, I stopped and just stared at myself in the mirror for a while, looking at the wrinkles that are beginning to appear, the spots that weren't there before, my hair that has changed so much since high school--no longer thick and full like it was, but kinda straggly and dull--and I kept thinking, "I'm almost 30. When did that happen? How did I get this old so fast?"

I despaired.

I'm getting older, and I'm finally graduating from college. Now what? I thought I'd be married by now, and have kids to take care of and a husband to feed. I have no idea what I'm going to do as far as a job or career goes. I have no prospects staring me in the face. No opportunity has presented itself so that the next step becomes an easy one. I have no clue what to do with my life.

After a while, I literally picked myself up off the floor and looked at myself again. I'm only 27. My wrinkles represent all of the smiling I've done so far in life. The spots mean I've spent some time in the sun. And my hair isn't dull or lifeless when I spend a little time doing something with it. I'm not really old. I'm just getting older. I almost have a BA in English. I can find opportunities to use what I've learned and grow in new ways.

I am intelligent, responsible, strong, creative, happy, and beautiful.

I am a daughter of God.